


The Words We Never Said

by TheFrailtyOfGenius_ItNeedsAnAudience



Category: Original Work
Genre: I have no idea how the military works, Major TWs in the chapters that concern them, Mentions of Sex, Multi, References to Drugs, consumption of alcohol, so I made my own
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 22:01:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29107494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFrailtyOfGenius_ItNeedsAnAudience/pseuds/TheFrailtyOfGenius_ItNeedsAnAudience
Summary: Alvah is just trying to live his life the best he can, but with domesticity comes unforeseen problems.So, the life (or some of it) of my OC, Alvah
Relationships: Original Male Character/Original Male Character





	1. 1

"Are you gonna come upstairs or just sit there with that drink you're treating better than you've ever treated me?"  
He looks up from the whiskey he'd been nursing for last 10 minutes to Scarlett's slight smirk. He rolls his eyes and nods.  
"We're not watching a film; I'll only fall asleep."  
She giggles slightly and nods, "Yeah, I know. I got some pictures to show you from last night."  
"Nothing too scandalous I hope."  
"Course not. What do you take me for?"  
Alvah lifts his eyebrows in a silent 'you really want me to answer that?' Scarlett just smiles and leads him upstairs.

They both settle on her bed, Alvah leaning on his arms, crossed, on the headboard behind them and Scarlett sits against it, swiping through her photos to get to the beginning of the previous night.  
"Right, here we go. How was work by the way?"  
Alvah just shrugs, "Yeah, fine. You know how it is."  
Scarlett, nodding, tilts her phone to him. "Shame you couldn't come out. Or just get Saturdays off."  
"I get Fridays. You're overestimating Laxus' generosity. Anyway, I don't like the bustle."  
"I know," she smiles, "But Alexis was there..." she waggles her eyebrows at him a bit.  
He looks at her, his eyes blank but questioning all the same. "You know, I do have a boyfriend. And I've never even met the man."  
"I know, but you want to." Smugness overtakes her features while irritation covers his. He sighs and mutters a "right" before taking the phone off her and swiping through.

They sit in a comfortable silence while he swipes through and grunts now and again in response to Scarlett points to certain bodies, putting a name to a face.  
"And of course, your future husband." She points to a man; dark hair, pale blue - almost purple - eyes, easy smile. He's drunk. Obviously. You can tell by the blush from his cheeks down to the small amount of visible flesh on his chest before his shirt covers the rest. Alvah just hums. She looks at him expectantly, "Aren't you gonna say he looks gorgeous or some shit like that?"  
He looks across to her, "No."  
"Suit yourself. I think he looks rather dashing."  
"I think he looks like he don't play for your team, darling."  
"Yeah well, works better for you that way doesn't it?" The smugness from earlier returns with a vengeance. He just rolls his eyes for what feels the hundredth time that day. She just laughs and then fills him in verbally with everything exciting that happened that night.

After a few hours, Alvah said his goodbyes to Scarlett and hopped in his car for the 25 minute drive home. He drives home in silence with the radio softly chatting in the background. Once reaching the flat, he pulls into the overcrowded car park, parks and runs his hands through his hair. Sighing, he gets out of the car, walks over to the flat, noticing the extra Volkswagen in front of it. His mother is here then. She was tolerable. Not his favourite but better than some of the past mothers; namely Charmeine's mother Agnis. She was one hell of a bitch. 

He pulls out his keys and pushes the door open, making eye contact with Boston as he does.  
"Hi Alvah. How was Scarlett's?" Boston tries for a smile, but it's too tight to be genuine.  
Alvah doesnt even attempt a smile, just grimaces back. "Yeah. Not too bad. Yvonne." He tips his head to Boston's mother who smiles, the only genuine smile in the room.  
"I'm going for a shower, then I'm going to bed. Started early this morning."  
Boston watches him walk out, furrows his brow slightly, and resumes his conversation with his mother. 

———

Alvah feels the bed dip. It has to be about 9:30, quite early for Boston considering it's Sunday tomorrow.  
"You asleep?"  
"No."  
Boston turns then, facing his back, "Alright," he inches forward until his stomach presses against Alvah's back "This okay?"  
Alvah breathes out. It's not quite a sigh but not quite a breath either. "Yeah. Yeah it's ok."  
Boston sighs then, except his is a sigh. Not contentment. Never contentment. 

The next morning, they awake, as always, as far apart as the double allows them, as though their subconscious is recoiling away from the other.  
“Mornin’.” Boston’s voice is pretty gravelly. It always is at the best of times.  
Alvah sighs and turns to face him, “Morning.”  
Boston turns then, and smiles lightly at him. Alvah just looks at him.  
“What?”  
“Nothing. You’re cute when you’re sleeping.”  
Alvah sighs and gets up, padding to the bathroom to prepare for another day of work. 

———

His phone buzzes on the side. The thought of Laxus wanting more paperwork feels like a migraine right now, so he ignores it. It buzzes again.  
“For fuck’s sake answer it.” Accusation laces his voice.  
“What do you think is gonna be on there, Boston?”  
“Who the hell knows with you.”  
Alvah just looks at him again. The silence drags on for a few seconds, the challenge of it thickening the air. The message is from Scarlett.  
_‘Wanna come out with us tonight?’_


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alvah goes for a few drinks with his friends.

Alvah steps out of his car as Scarlett and her friends rolled up. Locking it, he strolls over as they got out. 

The bar was a local place, only a ten minute drive for him, slightly longer for Scarlett and her friends as they had to do pickups. It wasn't high-end but not particularly shabby either. Fine for a few drinks, providing you stay away on Disco Tuesdays. The thought alone makes him inwardly shudder.  
"You all ready to go, handsome?" Scarlett is stepping beside him and linking her arm through his.  
"Ready as I'll ever be." She smiles in response. 

He glances back to see who else she's brought. He'd made her promise she wouldn't bring Ruby, she was a condescending bitch who liked to think she could pick up anyone she set her mind to, Alvah included, despite the recurring rejections she kept getting. Sora is in the passenger seat, pretty girl in her own right. Long hair that captures her round face perfectly, with her blue-green eyes looking at him with an air of expectation. Sora and Scarlett have been friends for years, so Alvah too had known her a just over a year now. Scarlett had said there would be four of them all together and the fourth gingerly stepped out of the car. Alexis. He'd never met the man before, but he was already skittish and they hadn't even entered the bar yet. 

They step in and get seated at a table. Nothing too fancy; the nearest window about 3 tables away, the nearest piece of 'abstract' art? In your line of view, no matter where you looked. He settles for the menu.  
"Who's paying?" Sora looks around hopefully.  
"I'm not getting black-out. If you all are, I'm getting a separate tab." He clips. Last time they ended up paying a round each, and while he was on lemonades, they were ordering gradually more bizarre cocktails with gradually increasing price tags. Never again.  
"Same here." It was Alexis; the first words he'd said since they'd pulled up. Alvah looks across at him, reading his features. Alexis half-smiles at him and tinges pink. And... probably the last words for a while. Maybe inebriation will coax more out of him.  
"No, we're not getting black-out. This'll be civil! A chance to relax. You ought to relax more, Alvah." He mumbles a reply as a waitress comes over and takes their orders.

They chat amicably between themselves, Scarlett carrying most of the conversation with the others piping in occasionally. Their drinks arrive quickly after ordering and Scarlett decides this is a good distraction to dive into personal questions.  
"So, Alexis, how's the dating scene with you?" She shoots a fleeting glance at Alvah and he inwardly cringes.  
"Uh, I mean, not great but, I can't say I'm too upset." He smiles and looks down at his drink. Lemonade, interesting, not trying to get drunk then. Inebriation won't be coaxing anything out of him yet. "Just not found the right..." he glances at Alvah then back to Scarlett, "person yet." Alvah hums in response, and Alexis looks over to him. "You got a girlfriend?"  
Alvah looks at him, confusion passing over his face for a second before he conceals it again, the mask of indifference returning. "No." Alexis nods, surprise washing over his face, before he takes a sip of his lemonade. He opens his mouth to speak but shuts it again. Scarlett takes this as an opportunity to delve further into this apparent therapy session.  
"How is your love life going then, Alvah? Me and Sora were only saying the other day that you haven't spoke about Boston for a while."  
He shoots her a questioning glance, "There's nothing to say, that's why. We're just tolerating each other's company until I inevitably break it off. Same as always. I think he gets off on the suspense." He shrugs.  
"I don't know why you don't just break up. You're obviously not in love with him anymore and it's just dragging you both down." Sora quips in. She always gets quite passionate about his and Boston's relationship. Probably cause she can't hold a boyfriend for longer than a month.  
"Look, if I needed relationship advice, I have a readily available mother _and_ sister; so don't you two worry about that." He scoffs, "I don't think I was ever in love with him. It was just nice to have some company, and hey, it was fun for a while. Let me go shooting in his dad's old wood."  
"I'm sure that was really worth all the crap you're going through now." Sora deadpans him.  
He shrugs, "Hiring's expensive."  
Alexis, who has been looking between them the whole time finally interjects, "Wait, wait, wait. You're gay?"  
Alvah looks at him, "Uh, yeah."  
Alexis smiles, "Oh wow! So am I."  
Alexis continues to beam at him despite the growing discomfort on his face. He glances to Scarlett who is also just smiling at him. He needs to say something, then.  
"Right, okay. Nice." Alexis nods and smiles more - somehow - and looks back down at his drink contented. At least someone was.

——— 

After a few more drinks and, thankfully, not too much more awkward conversation they head back to their cars. Alvah walks with them to Scarlett's Duster, whilst the others were in an animated conversation about some celebrity. When they reach the car they all turn to face him.  
"Well, thanks for coming out Alvah, both literally and figuratively," her and Sora laugh. Hilarious. "It's always cool when you come out, as humiliating as it is for you."  
"It's only humiliating when you make it humiliating."  
She smiles, "That's what I'm here for." He rolls his eyes but the corner of his lip twitches upward. "You love me really."  
"Something like that." He turns to Alexis and holds out his hand, "Was nice to meet you."  
Alexis smiles bashfully and shakes it,  
"You too." Alvah nods and looks back to his car.  
"I better be going anyway; Boston will only complain I'm home late."  
"He complains at anything you do, but yeah. Bye Alvah!" The other two echo her. He just holds up a hand and trudges back to his own car.  
Could've gone worse. 

__


	3. 3

The next week was pretty busy. He had work he needed to do, and his contractors were saying his project was nearly done, so he needed to visit and see if there were any last changes he needed. There weren't, and that meant the place was finished minus a few aesthetic changes here and there. He'd been having contractors in the house for about six months now; he'd planned to move in at this point, but Boston was adamant he wanted to remain in his flat, and with the state of their relationship, it wouldn't be long before he needed a place to stay himself anyway. 

The gate was fully coded now. The engineers had needed him to input a lock code and now the place was secure and ultimately his. Freedom, at last. The house had been the main thing keeping him with Boston, he didn't fancy moving back in with his parents. Not that they'd mind, of course.

———

The midday sun shines down on the garden. It was warm and Boston was out sunning himself on their balcony, which he had to lie on horizontally to just fit on. He steps out onto the balcony, and Boston lifted his sunglasses to look at him.  
"You alright?"  
Alvah nods and looks out over the forest of buildings in front of him. Nothing like the London cityscape. "Yeah, I'm good. I thought your friends were coming round today?"  
Boston hums, "Yeah. Later. They're coming round for tea." He stretches his arms out behind him. "We're getting pizza if you're staying around and not scurrying off somewhere."  
Alvah looks back out to the buildings. The constant blinking lights beat like the heart of the city. "Yeah, no. I'm going to see my father."  
Boston half sighs, "I thought as much," he tilts his head toward him, "He got you weed?"  
"No." Alvah furrows his brow, "Why? Thought you were against recreationals."  
"I am." The harshness of the words makes Alvah roll his eyes. He thinks he's so high and mighty. "I just wondered." He pulls his sunglasses back down, concealing the disapproval in his eyes.  
Alvah just hums and steps back into the flat. "I'm going now."  
"Enjoy." He wasn't quite sure if that was sarcastic or not, so he doesn't reply and grabs his car keys instead.

———

"Sora's right; just break up with him!" She looks at him, thinking, "Especially if your big new house is done. Though I suppose it'll be a bit lonely... me and Harrison could always move in?"  
He scoffs, "Kiara, I think I'm good. I don't need you and Harrison bumbling about. And anyway, mine's even further away from work for you."  
She grins, "Still, comfort's a luxury."  
There's a knock at the door and they both turn. Julian peeks his head in and smiles.  
"Not interrupting sibling bonding time, am I?"  
The two look at each other, then back at him. He smirks, "Your mother's home."  
Alvah nods and tells him he'll be out in a minute. He doesn't get all that much time with his sister, so they may as well talk for a little while. Well, banter being the correct word, really. 

After the natural lull in conversation, Kiara tells him to go out and speak to his mother, Marzia. She turns to face him from the kitchen.  
"Hi, Alvah. You well?" He nods even though she can't see him and sits on the sofa.  
"Not so bad. Yourself?" She hums, sliding a packet of biscuits into the cupboard. Ginger nuts, he notes. After folding her reusable bag and placing back in the draw, she comes over and sits with him.  
"So, what's going on with your life?" She looks over to him and realisation flashes across her features, "Oh! You've broken up with Boston!" She smiles, "He wasn't right for you, you know, and you know what I think. Maybe one day you'll-"  
"No." he quickly interjects her, throwing her a pointed look, "No, I haven't broken up with him. Yet, anyway. And you've told me what you think, yes."  
She looks a little crestfallen at this, before looking more concerned. He sighs. "Well, what's wrong then?"  
"Nothing. Nothing's wrong. I just thought I'd come visit."  
She narrows her eyes. "You never 'come visit' unless you've got something you want us to pry out of you. It's a boy isn't it?" He glances at her from the corner of his eye, "Yes, I thought so. So have you met someone?"  
"No."  
"Whatever you say. Keep me updated though." She beams at him as Julian comes down the stairs and they both look up. 

His parents were both in their late 50s now, the grey hairs starting to reveal themselves, no matter the frequency of re-dying their hair. They were settled and happy, their daughter married and their son more tamed than he used to be. Gone were the nights of getting calls from obscured alleys at 2:15 in the morning. They'd been married for nearly 30 years, and Kiara seemed to be following in their footsteps quite confidently. And who knew? Maybe he would too one day. 

He chatted amicably with his father for a while. Julian could talk about anything, give him the chance. He was welcome to his old room for the night, the nostalgia lulling him to sleep.

———

The next morning, he wakes to his phone vibrating on the side. Squinting at it's harsh light, he groans. Laxus' name lined the top of the screen. He'd want him there in half an hour and it was rush hour. Not happening. He may as well take his time. Swiping, he holds the phone to his ear.

———

He steps into the kitchen to the smell of bacon.  
"Eggs, Alvah?"  
"Sure." He'd put some on for Alvah anyway, anticipating his response. "Thanks." He adds.  
Julian just nods and plates him up his breakfast.  
"Heard you on the phone. Work?"  
"You know it." Julian smiles and they sit and eat. “Kiara not want anything?”  
Julian looks up, “No, she’s going to Harrison’s parents. Marzia told me that you might be getting a new boyfriend.”  
He rolls his eyes, “Yeah; we’ll see.” And with that his phone vibrated.  
“That from him?” Julian looks at him, amusement dancing in his eyes.  
Alvah flips it and the screen lights up, “Might as well be.”

_‘Going out for dinner. Alexis is coming ;)’_


	4. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dinner from Alexis’ view

He hops into the car, where Scarlett and Sora turn to face him. He greets them both and fastens his seatbelt.  
"Hey Alexis! You excited for tonight?"  
He chuckles slightly, "I don't know, maybe?" Sora smiles at him while Scarlett turns back to the wheel, "I'll drive next time, you always drive."  
She glances at him in the rear-view, "Don't worry about it. You've got a date." She winks and puts the car into gear.

———

The drive over is comfortable, silences dubbed by the quiet whine of the radio and the occasional conversation between them.  
"It's not a date, you know. You're going to be there too."  
"Yeah, we'll give you two some privacy after the meal." Sora winks to Scarlett.  
"I can't wait." Sarcasm laces his words and both of the girls laugh.

———

Scarlett pulls the car into the restaurant's car park. It's a different place from last time, further away but more reputable with a much better menu. He'd personally never been, but Sora said it was good, if not a little overpriced.

Not long after they pulled up, the white Tesla pulls into the car park. Alvah parks a short way from them, and strolls over. His hair is gelled, but still styled quite naturally, the golden frontal area in juxtaposition to black shirt and tight black jeans, hugging his figure nicely. He looks effortlessly stunning. The girls had gotten out of the car at this point, so he steps out too and walks with Sora into the restaurant, following behind the other two, his attention captured by Alvah's somewhat stiff gait.

———

They’re shown to their table by a young waitress. Sora had asked Scarlett to get her a glass of red wine, so the other three stood to go to the bar. He turns and almost walks straight into the chest of Alvah, who was looking out across the tables near theirs. Alexis' makes a strangled gasp, and prays he didn’t hear him. Though, he did take the opportunity to just glance over his figure.

He was well sculpted, the thin black shirt hugging his muscles. He wasn't built like a body-builder; that would have looked ridiculous with his height, but nevertheless well toned. He glances back up to his face and is met with his amused gaze. Shit, he'd been staring.  
"Uh, I like your shirt." That was not supposed to sound like a question.  
He didn't even glance down at it. "Thanks."  
Two minutes with him and and he'd already made himself look an idiot. He felt the blood creep to his cheeks.  
"Can I buy you a drink?" Confidence. That's what he needed. People bought him drinks, so why not offer.  
He hums, "Nah, it's all good. I'll buy you one. What do you want?"  
He had not been expecting that. "Lemonade. Thanks." He smiles. Alvah lifts his eyebrows and his lip quirks ever so slightly at the corner before he turns and heads to the bar. Alexis rejoins Sora at the table whilst Alvah and Scarlett order their drinks. Sora just smirks down at her menu.

The two return not long after, Alvah settling into his languid seating position. How could he even sit with his legs spread that wide in those jeans? He should _definitely_ not be looking. He quickly lifts his eyes and clears his throat.  
"So," he feels the table's eyes on him, "What's everyone having?"  
They all discuss their meals, thanking the waiter when their drinks arrive and then order their food. 

Scarlett decides to break the ice, "How's Boston?" He looks across to Alvah. He doesn't even flinch at the mention of his boyfriend's name. Interesting. He'd have to ask about that later.  
"He's fine, yeah. Like every time you ask."  
"Yeah I'm waiting for the day you say 'oh yeah, my ex? I dunno I don't speak to him'" Sora looks at him pointedly. He rolls his eyes in response. 

They chat while they wait for their food. The conversation is easy but nothing particularly revealing comes up, though if you're going to ask anything more private, you'd do it alone. The meals don't take long to arrive, and they eat in comfortable silence. Once they've all finished, sat for a little while and paid the bill, Sora pipes up,  
"We're going to the loo and then going to have a couple of drinks to ourselves. Why don't you two go out to the beer garden and chat a little?"  
Alvah looks completely unimpressed, and Alexis thinks he's going to decline, but instead he nods and stands up. He lifts one eyebrow in silent question, so Alexis gets up and follows him. 

"You want another drink?" Alvah looks across to him and nods his head in the direction of the bar.  
"Sure, but I'll pay. I insist."  
He expected more of a fight but Alvah just nods and merely asks for a glass of water. 

Once they had their drinks, the two walk out to the garden. There is a family and a group of friends out there, but other than them, they are alone. Alvah beckons him to the back corner, away from the bystanders and sits on a lone bench, placing his drink down beside him. The two sit in silence for a few seconds and Alvah gazes out across the hills in the background, past the beer garden's flaking white fence. He looks a more relaxed than usual, the harshness of his piercing amber eyes reduced slightly.  
"Beautiful isn't it?"  
Alvah chuckles and looks across to him, "They're only hills. You're setting the bar quite low."  
Alexis chuckles too, "I guess, but it shouldn’t be the most exclusive things that are only things classed as beautiful."  
Alvah tilts his head ever so slightly and nods thoughtfully. "Yeah, you're right." He looks back out to the hills for a brisk moment before looking back at him. "How old are you?"  
"Twenty-four."  
Alvah hums in acknowledgement. "Twenty-two."  
Alexis nods, not much younger than him. He didn't know whether he would be younger or older than the other man. He appeared young but he bristled easily, with his harsh gaze often accompanied by a clipped tone. Or that's what he'd heard. 

"You been to uni?"  
"Nah. You?"  
"No. I wanted to but I couldn't really afford."  
"You do realise they give you a loan?"  
Alexis looks at him, the 'obviously' unsaid but Alvah smirks all the same.  
"Fair enough. What do you do then? Not like it's easy to get a job nowadays. Even with a degree." His interest piques as Alvah shifts a little and doesn't reply straight away. None of the girls had mentioned his occupation, only that he was moderately well-off. Eventually, Alvah speaks,  
"It's classified." Government then? Alvah shrugs in a sort of nonchalant apology. "What about you?"  
Alexis narrows his eyes slightly, "Office job." Alvah nods. Alexis decides to change the subject. "So, what's going on with your boyfriend?"  
Alvah rolls his eyes, "He's just a bit of a dick. Nothing untoward, but they think I'd be better off without him." He smiles slightly, "They're right."  
Confusion weaves its way across his features,  
"Then why not break up with him?"  
Alvah just shrugs. Not serious then. Waiting for the right moment to break it off. He'd been told as much, but it was nice to hear it privately from the source. "Was he your first?"  
Alvah looks at him, physically bristling; something unreadable in his eyes, "Boyfriend or fuck?"  
Alexis puts his hands up in a pacifying notion. "I meant boyfriend."  
He doesn't particularly relax, still eyeing him with suspicion. "I guess." Is he embarrassed?  
"I've only had one boyfriend but we broke up a while ago. His name was Andrew."  
This seems to relax him a little. He was like an animal; the untamed and wild instinct always just below the surface.  
"What made you break up?"  
"Um," it was his turn to shift in discomfort this time, "He wasn't very pleasant. Let's put it like that." He tries to smile and knows it's strained but the pacification has the desired effect. The tension flows out of Alvah's form and curiosity takes its place. Alexis waits for the prying, but it never comes.  
"You a virgin then?"  
He was not expecting that, either.  
"Uh, no, I've..." he trails off and resorts to nodding. Blood pooling in his cheeks. Alvah looks completely unbothered now. Curiosity still dancing in his eyes, joined swiftly by amusement.  
"Andrew? Or before?"  
"Well, properly with Andrew." He looks across to the family. The children's laughs catching on the wind. "I did... bits in school. You know." He was hoping for a topic change, but he wasn't so lucky.  
Alvah hums and nods. "How old?"  
He inwardly cringes. He knew Alvah was well aware of his discomfort from the faint smirk on his lips when he glances back at him. "With Andrew?" Alvah nods "Twenty-one." This makes the smirk grow wider. He nods and looks at the group of friends playing some game in the opposite corner.  
"How old were you then when you...?"  
Alvah chuckles, "Seventeenth birthday."  
"Present?"  
Alvah shrugs again, "If you'd like." Realisation dawns across his features and he looks back at Alexis. "Wait, no. Not like a present, just... happened I guess. It wasn't paid or anything."  
Alexis smirks, "But he knew it was your birthday?"  
Alvah looks at him, unimpressed. "Well, yes but-"  
"Then it was definitely a present." Alexis laughs and Alvah chuckles too. 

This wasn't half as bad as he'd expected. He'd thought he would've been a blushing mess, unable to get a cohesive sentence out of his lips. The time had passed quickly, and it was beginning to dusk.  
“Thanks for talking with me. It’s been nice.” Alexis smiles at him.  
He smiles back. “Yeah, it hasn’t been half as awkward as I’d imagined.”  
He blushes slightly, “Shut up.”  
“You want me to help you find the girls?”  
He nods, “Please.” 

——— 

They find the girls moderately quickly. Sora was chatting up a clearly uninterested guy in white jeans, but she was dragged away by Scarlett when Alexis beckons her over. Not that white-jeans particularly minds. 

The four of them walk to the cars together, Scarlett and Sora getting in first, leaving Alvah and Alexis alone. Now or never.  
“Can I get your number?”  
Alvah passively watches him before nodding and pulling his phone out of his pocket. How the hell he’d got that phone in there, Alexis would never know. He enters the number and sends a text so Alvah had his too. They nod at each other, and Alexis smiles.  
“Night, Alexis.”  
“Night, Alvah.” 


	5. 5

The drive back to Boston's was pretty tranquil. The outing had gone quite well and Alexis had warmed to him somewhat, the skittishness from before blending into bashfulness. He was definitely interested, and the ball was in Alvah's court now. He doubts Alexis will text first with his hesitation of asking for Alvah's number, and he has a boyfriend. Something has to change then. He pulls up outside the flat, sighs and steps inside. 

The door whines on its hinges as he pushes it open, locking it behind him. Silence engulfs the space around him. He heads up to their bedroom and finds the door ajar, a soft light illuminating the inside. The room opens up as he enters, pressing the door shut behind him. Boston is lying across their double; the lamp on the bedside table still turned on. His face is smoothed out in the cocoon of sleep, his body curled up like an infant. He'd clearly been waiting up but had since fallen asleep. Saves Alvah's breath, anyway.

He strips and put on a pair of boxers as silently as possible, only stirring Boston as he slips under the sheets. Boston shifts toward him, unconsciously moving to the new source of heat. He watches but makes no effort to move toward him, instead putting his phone on silent and turning his back to Boston. Morning then.

———

He wakes to the chirps of birdsong and glances to Boston. Still asleep. He stretches and wanders to the bathroom, simulating the scenarios in his head and steeling himself for whichever outcome prevails. After washing his hands, he strolls back into the bedroom and looks at Boston's sleeping form. He always looks so young; his naive attitude not helping his cause. He's never really felt much for younger men. Shaking the thought, he dresses again and grabs his phone before making himself some toast.

———

He was finishing his coffee when he heard movement upstairs. He checked his phone. Nothing. He didn't have to wait long before Boston joined him in the kitchen.  
"What time did you get back last night?"  
"About midnight. You were asleep."  
Boston glances at his empty plate before looking back at his face, his face housing a questioning expression. Surely he wasn't expecting breakfast; he wasn't a maid. He innocently smiles, it's obviously fake and Boston just rolls his eyes and flips on the kettle.  
Alvah inhales, "I wanna talk to you."  
This draws his attention. He turns to face him again, his back pressed against the counter; the kettle temporarily forgotten. Wariness laces his features. He was paranoid Alvah was cheating on him before he started regularly going out with his friends. Long work hours, calls and an unpredictable schedule obviously did that to some people. Not that paranoia helped them.

Boston nods, comprehension falling over him before Alvah even speaks his next words.  
"Look, we both know this isn't going anywhere and it's pointless. We may as well break it off now." He shrugs, "It's as good a time as ever."  
Boston's face is grim but he nods, "It was a matter of time, Alvah. But what, you found a new boyfriend?"  
He rolls his eyes, "Not yet. But perhaps."  
Boston nods. That's it. Resignation hangs in the air as the two remain in awkward silence. Where was he suppose to go from here? He damn well wasn't apologising.  
"When are you leaving then?" Boston had turned to the kettle again now, pouring the boiling water into one of his pathetic little mugs that changed colour when it got hot. He loved stupid things like that. Pointless in his opinion.  
"I don't know. Whenever."  
"Then pack your shit."  
"Nothing like a warm send-off." Sarcasm laces his voice but he gets up anyway, no point in staying here now. "Give your mother my regards." He doesn't wait for an acknowledgement and heads for the bedroom instead.

———

Ten minutes later he's driving down the motorway. Again. He feels like he hasn't stopped driving these last few weeks. He never had much at Boston's flat; the more there, the more he had to move later. It proved to be a good inclination as he had only two boxes in his car, mostly just clothes. The freedom was a relief. It felt like a cord had been cut, so taut it was constricting him, but he'd never noticed. Maybe that was why everyone wanted them to break up; they did notice. He shrugs, nothing like thinking in retrospect.

He presses a few buttons on his dash, waiting for the sound of an outgoing call. The harsh sound echoes through the car for a few seconds.  
"Hello? You alright Alvah?"  
"Hi. Yeah, I'm good. Got some good news for you."  
"I'm listening."  
"I broke up with Boston."  
He hears the smile on his father's lips through the speakers, "Oh, your mother will be pleased." He chuckles, "Took you long enough."  
"Hey, now, don't spoil it."  
They both laugh and talk for the remainder of Alvah's journey. Marzia had spoken to him too, glad that he'd finally broken it off. If his parents were this happy, when Sora finds out, she'll want a party. Grabbing a box, he unlocks the door.

The house sprawls out in front of him, the open plan making it feel more spacious than it really is, not that it's small. He places the box on the side before heading back and grabbing the second. He'd already unpacked what stuff he had here, just never slept over. His more valuable assets he'd left at Julian's or stashed in hidden rooms. He'd used six architects and had each plan out separate sections, so even they didn't know the full dimensions. He'd done some of the more delicate work himself. He wasn't too bad at plastering if his privacy depended on it.

———

After carrying both the boxes upstairs, he checked his phone again. Still nothing. He opens Alexis' contact and hits messages.  
_Hi_  
He looks at it like the word is foreign to him. He has no idea of text etiquette when faced with a possible date. He cringes to himself, deletes it, and tries again.  
_Morning. How are you?_  
He sighs, still somewhat dissatisfied, but presses send before he can change his mind. He stands to begin unpacking his two boxes, but his phone vibrates as his hands hovers over the first. Alexis' name flashes on the screen. That was quick.  
_Not bad thanks. How are you?_  
Single, he thinks to himself. That conversation was better to have in person. He knew it'd only be a matter of time before they met up again.  
_Not too bad myself_  
The reply is almost instant again. Not that he'd delayed in replying much himself.  
_Got any plans for tomorrow night?_  
He stares at it for a minute. Was this a preposition? He wasn't a prude, and they had met a couple of times. He'd obviously taken too long to reply, as the three dots appear under Alexis’ last message.  
_I just meant Scarlett's having a sleepover. She said I could invite you_  
Oh. Innocent. Obviously. Alexis blushes for merely admiring. He chastises himself for his stupidity and quickly writes out a reply.  
_Sounds good. I'll have work in the morning though, so I might be a little late depending on the time_  
_No problem. See you then :)_  
He smiles to himself, and gets to work unpacking his boxes.


	6. 6

The next day goes by pretty quickly. Alexis had text him to say that they were meeting at Sora's for 6pm. He'd been driving back for over an hour now. He glances at the clock, 7:02. He pulls into his drive, unloads the car and heads for a shower.

———

By 7:14 he's driving again, this time following the familiar route to Sora's. He'd text her earlier in the day too, saying that six was impossible so he'd turn up whenever he was done. She'd told him to ring her when he was on the way to decide what to do about food. They'd already eaten, so it was up to him to decide what he wanted.

He pulls up by her drive at quarter to eight; the small house unobtrusive against the rest of the street. Not too late, though it meant he'd have little to no choice in activities. Oh well. He knocks on the door, one arm carrying lemonade and the other some chips he'd picked up on the way. The door opens and Sora ushers him inside. They're watching some animated film, all sat together on the sofa. Alexis pries his attention away for two seconds to give him a smile and a wave. Who said chivalry was dead?

———

Once he finishes his meal, the film is finishing too. He pads into the living room and the others acknowledge his presence.  
"Aww, Alvah you missed it. It was so good!" Alexis grins at him from the sofa, patting the seat next to him as Alvah approaches. He takes it.  
"Yeah, I'm sure."  
Scarlett decides to pipe in, "Alvah always falls asleep anyway. He would've missed it either way." Alexis chuckles. He just rolls his eyes. 

The girls briefly argue over what music to put on, but soon they're all lounging around the living room and chatting amongst themselves for a while. The music a quiet backdrop. Eventually, the conversation moves to sleeping arrangements.  
"Well, I only have two bedrooms," Sora looks between the two men, "So why don't you two share, and then we will."  
"Yeah," Scarlett smirks, "My mum always used to tell me not to sleep in the same room as boys when there's a sleepover. Never know what could happen." Alexis is smiling and blushing slightly. Sora smiles at them both too, making him feel like he's missing some unspoken connection.  
"We should probably go and get ready for bed. Night!" With that, Sora gets up and drags Scarlett upstairs with her, who wishes them a goodnight and waves as she's half hauled up the stairs.

The two men watch and listen to them both patter about upstairs.  
"No point going up yet. They'll be in the bathroom for half an hour each." Alexis chuckles in response.  
"Yeah." He looks to Alvah, "How was work?"  
Alvah lifts his gaze to meet the shorter man's, not that there was much in their height when they were both sat down.  
"Yeah, not bad."  
"You work long hours or just start late?"  
"Long hours, I guess. I lose a lot of time just travelling."  
He nods, "Yeah, my mum used to work about an hour away. She always used to leave real early." He smiles, but his eyes hold sadness, the memory obviously bittersweet. He nods, not really knowing what to say. People don't normally like the direct approach, but he wasn't particularly good at stepping carefully.  
"What did she do?" He looks away, contemplative. He'd never seen him like this. Then again, he had only seen him a handful of times.  
"Oh, she was a teacher. Primary." he nods, "She used to tell me stories when I was little. How it'd be when I went to school." The smile slips from his face. "I was nearly five when she left."  
Was that an invitation or a statement?  
"Right." He cringes, but then curiosity takes the place of his awkwardness. 'Left' implies divorce, not death. Unhappy marriage, in all probability. "What about your father?"  
Alexis looks back at him, his gaze guarded but not indignant; he shrugs. "Old man stuck in his ways, I guess. The relationship was never great, but I was too young to understand." Alvah nods, Alexis smiles slightly, "But we're getting depressing."  
Alvah shrugs, "Life always is." Alexis narrows his gaze at him a little and Alvah lifts an eyebrow.  
Alexis smirks a little, "Nothing, it was just a weird thing to say."  
"True though."  
Alexis hums, "Not for everyone," he glances out of the window, the passing traffic seemingly a good focal point. Confusion takes over his features, but he drops the subject. Then, they hear a door close and Alvah gets up. Alexis follows and they make their way upstairs.

———

They both settle in the guest bedroom after brushing their teeth. They got changed separately in the bathroom; no point risking embarrassment if it could be avoided. Alvah never normally wore bedclothes but decided to make an exception for tonight. The lights were off, a small bedside lamp the only illumination.

He hops on the bed, automatically claiming the right side. Alexis sits down across from him and pulls the sheets over them both.  
"How long have you had that job?"  
"Since I was twenty."  
Alexis nods and smirks, "What did you do before that?"  
Alvah glances across at him, uncertain of the implications of the sentence, "Uh, I worked in the military."  
Surprise takes over Alexis features, and his smile softens. "My dad was in the army."  
A flicker of surprise flows through Alvah before he masks it again. "What's his name?"  
"Sarthaal Soren."  
He stares at him, mouth slightly agape, " _He's_ your father?"  
Alexis sheepishly smiles and nods. Alvah mentally tries to connect their features but fails miserably. The only trait they seem to share is hair colour, so he'd never have guessed the severe captain he once knew to have sired such a timid son.  
"You must look like your mother."  
"So they tell me." He shrugs and smiles, not quite reaching his eyes, "You knew him well?"  
"No, not really. Knew of him, but we'd acknowledge each other if we passed. Sebas knew him better than me."  
"Sebas?"  
"He was a..." Strings of words that never quite fit their relationship flooded his thoughts before he settled on one, "Friend." Safety in detachment, but he knew the pause was too long for that.  
Alexis mouthes the word back to him. His brow furrows and he opens his mouth to speak but ends up closing it again, the words evading him. He tries again, "Was..." He trails off, but quickly recovers, "Sorry if I'm being presumptuous, but was he the guy you lost your virginity to?"  
Alvah just hums and nods, an acceptance but noncommittal. "Don't tell your father. I don't want to dirty his name if he's still serving."  
"No, course."  
Silence falls over them then, Alexis lost in thought. Alvah glances around the room. He'd never stayed here before. The room was neutral, the cream walls and brown carpet holding nothing about it's previous life. A history shrouded in mystery.

The silence stretches, though it isn't uncomfortable, and Alvah takes it as a hint that the conversation is over. He rolls onto his side, facing the wall. It's only defining feature a scenic photo of a wood; the sun peeking through the branches, chasing away the darkness as it does so. He hears the sheets rustle as Alexis repositions himself too.  
"Goodnight Alvah."  
"Night Alexis."  
Alexis shifts again to turn off the light, the click briefly echoing through the room. He settles after this, and Alvah listens to the pattern of his breaths. He can tell he's still awake, but makes no effort to converse, waiting. 

A little time passes before Alexis sighs again and rolls on his side, mumbling to himself as he turns, just a breath of sound in the otherwise silent room. The other man doesn't know it, but Alvah has exceptional hearing. Though he can't catch the whole of it, he distinctly hears a name. _Sebas._


	7. 7

Light peers through the cream curtains, as his eyes flicker briefly open. He turns, still sleep-dazed, and curls into the warmth before he registers what he's snuggling into. Well shit. The haze swiftly lifts and he pulls back, trying to escape the other mans grasp and disturb him as little as possible. He stirs anyway, grunting in protest to Alvah's departure.

He pads to the bathroom, not really knowing if Alexis is asleep or not. After using the toilet, he dresses and pulls the door open. He glances back at Alexis, who had been successfully beckoned back into sleep, before heading downstairs. He was pretty well familiarised with the art of sneaking out of another man's bed.

———

The girls greet him down there, inviting him to use any appliances. He makes himself a coffee - black, the only way he takes it - and sits down to wait for the toaster. Scarlett excuses herself to go to the loo while Sora smiles at him from across the table, so he pointedly looks away and browses his phone.  
"Well?" He looks up to Sora's accusatory tone, her stare burning his skin.  
"Well what?" He tries not to sound as exasperated as he feels, but it's half-hearted at best.  
"Well you better not have had a one night stand with him. That boy is worth more than meaningless sex, Alvah." He opens his mouth to protest, but she silences him, "No. You come down here, you didn't speak to him and now you won't look at me. And in my bed!" Her tone rising until she's almost shouting. He looks at her, nothing concealing his utter bewilderment at the situation.  
"For fuck's sake, we didn't have sex! Jesus." She continues to stare, incredulous. "Ask him if you're so convinced."  
"I shall."  
With that, the toaster pings and he got up, grateful for a distraction as Sora stomps in the direction of the stairs.

———

Scarlett trots back in as he's soaking his plate. She walks up to him, standing on her toes to whisper into the shell of his ear. "What was up with Sora?"  
He rolls his eyes, "She thought we had sex. Why is she so invested in my love life anyway? It's like she's my mother - no she's worse, actually. My mother rarely comments."  
Scarlett laughs but tries to smother it with her fist. He smiles too, putting his plate on the drying rack before he turns to face her.  
"I suppose I ought to go up. Don't really want her rifling through my shit."  
Scarlett nods and smiles at him as he exits.

———

As he steps into the room, two sets of eyes immediately land on him. Alexis is standing next to the bed, wearing his jeans but no shirt. He deliberately looks to Sora.  
"Done accusing me now?"  
She hums and looks away, "Sorry."  
He rolls his eyes. "Whatever." She looks back to him and flashes him a smile he presumes is supposed to be apologetic. She misses the mark. He looks back to Alexis. "You want me to..." he trails off, and gestures to the door but Alexis shakes his head.  
"No, stay. We never got a chance to talk properly this morning." Alvah furrows his brow. Is this supposed to be a guilt trip? "Come sit. Just let me grab my t-shirt." Alvah perches on the bed, neutralising his expression, while Alexis takes his meticulously folded shirt from the drawer. He pulls it over his head, the muscles in his arms flexing as he does so. He watches, his face able to remain it's practised blank, as Alexis sits back down. 

Alexis sighs and rests his hand on Alvah's thigh. He looks down at it, considering.  
"I'm sorry, she's a little overprotective."  
Alvah hums in response, before his brain catches up with the conversation. He snaps his gaze back up to the other man's face, who's watching him with a look he can't quite name. "Oh no, you don't need to apologise. Not your fault she's tetchy."  
Alexis silently laughs and smiles at him, moving his hand gently. The smile slips and he looks down to his hand. The emotion from minutes ago returns to his face, and Alvah tries his best to compare it to the faces Kathrine used to show him back when he was a child.  
"So what happened between you and Sebas? How come you quit?" Sympathy? The chart didn't have a face for that.  
"Nothing. He went out to Afghanistan. It was his second placement there." He pauses, he knows he has to choose his next words with some care to not shatter whatever the hell was going on between them. "And I didn't quit as such. It was... decided for me, I guess."  
Realisation dawns as he hears Alexis' quiet 'oh' at his words. Termination was never something you were proud of, honourable or not. Though, he wasn't going to expand on that yet, and Alexis didn't push. 

He looks back to his face, and Alexis smiles at him. He decides to bite the bullet.  
"Why are you looking at me like that?"  
The emotion cracks and is replaced with confusion, "Like what?"  
"No, you're not doing it anymore." He sighs, frustrated with himself, "Never mind."  
"Okay." Alexis resumes the motions with his hand, and Alvah sighs again, though it's not as harsh this time. "Do you..." He clears his throat and tries again, "Is this okay?"  
They both look down at his hand simultaneously. "Yeah, it's ok." Alexis smiles and squeezes slightly. Isn't this what boyfriends do? Maybe he should ask. "Are you hungry?" It wasn't what he'd meant to say but he thought of it as returning the favour.  
"A bit." He taps the hand not distracted with Alvah's leg twice; nervous. "You, um, wanna come back to mine for a bit after I've eaten?"  
Alvah nods, at a loss for words for a few seconds before he regains his composure, "Sure, yeah. Sounds great." Alexis smiles and nods, before squeezing his thigh again and standing up. 

Okay, _that_ sounded like a preposition.


	8. 8

He remains on the bed for a little while after Alexis has gone downstairs. He peers down to his left thigh, still feeling the ghost of touch there. He smiles but the moment is bittersweet, quickly dismissing the memories he tries not to think about all too often. Oh, how the universe always seems to come full circle. He shakes his head and gets up. 

———

He steps into the kitchen and the girls fall silent. He sighs, and makes his way to the table, ignoring the strained silence. Alexis is quietly humming to himself while frying two eggs. He tears his gaze away and instead looks to Scarlett who gently smiles at him.  
"So, what are you doing now Alvah?"  
He lifts an eyebrow, "Is that a sign you want me to leave?" Sora scoffs and he glares at her, "Well I'm going back with Alexis so you'll have to wait."  
"No, of course not. That sounds _great_ , doesn't it Sora?" She elbows Sora in the torso.  
"Yup, sounds nice." Her words are still laced with sarcasm but he just smiles at her, all teeth and no truth. 

Him and Sora have never been the best of friends. He wouldn't class them 'friends' at all, but he rarely did with anyone. She considered him a friend despite his lack of social skills and her own bad attitude. They never went out together when not in a group.

———

Not too much later, though long enough for the tension to be thick enough to be cut with a knife (despite Scarlett's futile attempts at breaking it), Alexis finishes his eggs and toast. He motions to Alvah after downing a cup of water and they both say their goodbyes, grab their bags and leave the house. 

They step out, and Alvah unlocks his car and puts his bag on the backseat. Alexis follows his lead, just double checking for affirmation before sliding into the passenger seat.  
"I have no idea where you live."  
Alexis chuckles and nods, "You want me to direct you or pop it in the satnav?"  
Alvah shrugs, "Either's fine."  
Alexis makes no move toward the dash, so he pulls out and follows his directions.

———

"How long you had this?"  
Alvah assumes he's talking about the car and obliges, "Nearly a year now." He runs one hand across the lower third of the wheel, relishing the texture of the cool leather beneath his fingers. Alexis hums and continues to gaze out of the window. The two sit in comfortable silence for a while, occasionally interjected by Alexis’ pointers. 

———

He pulls into a flat block's parking lot. Turning off the ignition, he looks across to Alexis who smiles in return. The two grab their bags, Alvah throwing his into the compartment under his bonnet, as Alexis leads them upstairs into his small flat.  
"Well, this is it."

The flat opens into an open plan kitchen and living room, with a bedroom and bathroom down a short corridor. Alvah looks around briefly before following Alexis into the bedroom. It’s as minimalist as the rest of the flat, a few personal items dotted around. His eye is drawn to a picture of a young boy and a women, smiling while embracing each other on a beach. Even as a child, the relation of the two was unmistakable. He debates whether to bring it up, but Alexis turns to face him before he can avert his gaze. He looks across to it, his gaze as contemplative as before but he doesn't speak. Alvah knows better than to press.  
"You, uh, wanna sit in here or the living room?"  
Alexis starts slightly, before nodding and leading him back through to the living room. 

The two sit, Alvah still taking in his surroundings. He knew you could find out a lot about a person by their house, but all it was revealing to him was the dreariness of a London flat. It reminded him a little of Boston's damp little flat, but the layout was completely different.  
"You want a drink?"  
The question pulls him out of his thoughts and he nods. "I'll just take a water. Thanks."  
Alexis pads across the room to the kitchen and pours them both a glass of water.  
"How long you had this place?"  
"Well I'm renting it, obviously," Alvah nods, "But about four months. I moved in after breaking things off with Andrew." Oh yes. Andrew, the mysterious, abusive ex. A minefield, as Alvah prefers to think of it. He hums.  
"It's nice."  
"Thanks, I guess. Not as nice as your car."  
He smiles, "Well, it’s bit more practical than my car."  
He smiles too. There’s a pause. “I don't really have anything planned, I'm afraid."  
"Didn't expect you too." He glances across to find Alexis' gaze already on him. He nods. "You not working today?"  
"Nah. Tomorrow. You?"  
"Yeah, tomorrow for me too." He sips his drink.  
"How come you left this morning?" He looks back across to Alexis to find him suddenly very interested in the carpet.   
"I wanted a piss?" He looks up at Alvah, unimpressed. "I don't know. I just didn't want it to," he shrugs, "Be too much."  
Alexis considers before nodding. "Thanks, but you didn't need to. I would've been okay." _You weren't the problem_ , he muses but stays silent. 

The two talk about nothing in particular for a while, getting to get each other better. Where they grew up, where they went to school. Alvah did miss bits out that he didn't think they were quite ready for yet; though inevitably, they strayed back onto rocky territory.  
"So what about when you were a baby? Your sister use to babysit you?"  
Alvah grimaces but he knew it'd come up eventually. Better to get it out of the way before he met his family.  
"I'm adopted."  
Alexis gapes at him for a few seconds, before his brain catches up with him.  
"You never said." His voice is gentle, like talking to a helpless child.  
"It never came up." It comes out a lot harsher than he intended, and Alexis furrows his brow before sitting back.  
"Here I was telling you my sop story about my mum, and you go and drop that bombshell."  
Alexis smiles. Alvah smiles back.  
"Didn't want to steal your limelight."  
Alexis laughs, the sound like silk against the dark, harsh corners of the flat.  
"Thanks, I appreciate it." He leans forward again and their knees brush. They just look at each other for a moment. That pesky emotion worming it's way back onto Alexis' features. He pointedly ignores it. "How old were you?" His voice is softer now. Not like before - not pity, just soft.  
It's not quite as hard to talk anymore. "One and a half when I was put into care. Six when my father took me in."  
"Was it difficult to adjust?"  
"Somewhat, but it was a nice change." Alexis hums again, and takes Alvah's hand intertwining their fingers.  
"This okay?" Alvah nods in response. Alexis smiles, but it pales against the sheer emotion in his eyes. They were close now, boundaries temporarily forgotten, though he didn't feel intruded upon. They stay like that for a little while, relishing in each other's company and the warmth of another body. 

Eventually, the peace is disrupted and the two separate. Alexis excuses himself to the loo and Alvah glances at the clock. He'd been here for a couple of hours now, and he knew there was a limit on how long company was welcome for. When Alexis returns, Alvah informs him of his decision to leave and that they'd have to text soon. Alexis agrees and walks with him to the door. They stand there, looking at each other; neither knowing quite where the line was drawn. Alexis takes his hand again.  
"It's been nice today. Thanks for coming round."  
"Course."  
Alexis smiles and briefly looks away. His gaze captures Alvah and he flushes slightly, "Can I kiss you?"  
Alvah blinks, assessing the situation between them. But he nods, unconsciously darting his tongue across his lips as he does so. Alexis squeezes his hand, before pressing his lips to Alvah's. He pulls back soon after, smiling, the blush creeping down the neck of his t-shirt.  
"Thanks."  
Alvah smiles slightly and squeezes his hand in return, before releasing it. They say their goodbyes, and Alvah exits the block and gets in his car.

He felt damn lightheaded. He smiles and starts up the ignition.


	9. 9

The next few days passed, the two men texting each other somewhat regularly. They hadn't spoke that much about the kiss, nor the implications of it on their relationship, though Alvah knew they were on the descent to boyfriends - not that he was particularly affronted by the idea. 

Though, it had got him thinking. The whole scenario giving him a sense of familiarity. He actively tried not to think about his military days, but he could resist anything except temptation... and temptation it was. 

_——x——  
 **March, 26th: 2013**_

_The beer bottles lay discarded and scattered across the dorm, discretion having been lost a while ago.  
"We're gonna go see if we can sneak some more." The slur in Westbridge's words was progressively getting worse, but he hiccuped and continued, "You coming Draconis?"  
"I'm good. I'll just chill here a bit. Keep Smallwood company." He smiles as the other men pile out of the room, leaving him and Sebas alone in silence. Their beds were adjacent to each other, Alvah's signifying the end of the semicircle. _

_He hadn't drank much, though he never really did. The monotony of army training meant a birthday was a good reason to party, and so the boys were making the most of it. Sebas had drank more than him, but less than most of the others. He was past tipsy, but not completely gone. It was his birthday after all, and they'd all have to train tomorrow as usual._

_Movement brings him out of his thoughts as the bed dips beside him. Sebas stretches his legs out and leans back against the wall, mirroring Alvah's position. They glance at each other.  
"You enjoying yourself?"   
He hums, "More than I'll enjoy the headache tomorrow."   
"Should've thought about that before you brought up the fine idea of smuggling alcohol in here."   
Sebas raises an eyebrow, "It _was _a fine idea, just not to your tastes."  
Alvah rolls his eyes, but breathes a laugh anyway. God, the man was beautiful. _

_He was more dishevelled than Alvah had ever seen him, his hair disrupted by the other blokes messing it up after winning or losing (the outcome didn't really matter) some stupid drinking game. He was still wearing his khakis, not having bothered to change after his training this morning; the muted colours bringing out the vibrancy of his green eyes. The two were sitting closer than they ever had and Alvah was fighting the blush threatening to rise to his cheeks. He ultimately loses, but Sebas just smiles._

_Alvah glances to the door.  
"You can look at me, you know." Alvah is slightly disgruntled but nevertheless obliges.  
"What for? I don't wanna be scarred."  
Sebas chuckles but his gaze is unguarded, "Yeah, you don't work with Sid every day."  
Alvah smiles, "True. I just have McCarth's attitude."  
"Fuck off, the guy loves you." He shrugs, "Not that he'd admit it." _

_The two just look at each other. Sebas' gaze slides down his body, and suddenly he feels self-conscious. What was he looking for? Apparently satisfied - or he didn't look dismayed, at least - his piercing gaze lands on Alvah's face again. It shifts for a moment, and he narrows his eyes before looking down and resting his hand on Alvah's thigh. Alvah looks down then, unnerved by the display of intimacy so commonly scorned in the army, notwithstanding the fact of them both being men. Sebas is looking at him, and Alvah recognises the gauging look in his eye; a silent request for consent. He nods. He wants to ask what the hell is going on, but decides on:  
"You're gay?"  
No emotion slides across the broader man's face, but he looks away and rubs Alvah's upper leg absently. "No, I didn't lie when I said I've had sex with women." He pauses, but Alvah understands immediately. "I'm bi."  
He mumbles a quiet 'oh' and Sebas looks back to him, his gaze somewhat tender.   
"I won't say anything if you don't." He smiles, but it's somewhat sad and Sebas nods.   
"I would have already said something was I going to. You're not as slick as you think." Alvah is half affronted, but doesn't say anything. Sebas smirks, "I don't think the boys are particularly suspicious though, you're good."  
Alvah sighs, and nods. There's only so far you can go, and it's not like he was particularly effeminate anyway. He decides to change the subject.   
"You ever been with a man?"  
"Nope. You?"  
"No." At least they were both inexperienced when it came to men.   
"I've never really..." Sebas trails off, but he quickly recomposes himself. "I've never really been attracted to many guys."  
"Does that make me special?" There was the hidden question of 'do you think I'm attractive?' behind that. He didn't have the gall to ask unfiltered.   
"Maybe." The conversation stills after that, Alvah not really getting an answer. _

_Sebas continues the brushes of his hand and Alvah looks down at it. He must be feeling something. He gazes back up to find Sebas watching him, emotion prevailing over his features. He smiles, only a little thing but it conveys enough and Sebas sighs gently.  
"Can I kiss you?"  
Alvah chuckles, but swiftly realises he isn't joking. Oh, _shit _. Every instinct is telling him to do it, but hard logic overpowers them.  
"No, you're drunk. You'll regret it." He darts his eyes to Sebas, expecting to find anger or at least disappointment. He finds neither.   
"I'd only regret the way I did it; but of course. Tomorrow, perhaps?" Amusement sparkles in his eyes - he's impressed.   
Alvah smiles and nods, "Okay. You try your luck again tomorrow."  
Sebas smiles back, and Alvah hears the distinct march of an officer followed by the patter of feet from the rest of their dorm.   
"Seb, shift your arse back to your bed. Company's coming." Sebas swiftly, but not unkindly, withdraws and heads back to his own bed as the door slams open.   
"_What _is the meaning of_ this _?" Busted._

_———_

_**March, 27th: 2013** _

_The next morning, he gets up and prepares for training as usual, ignoring the grunts and comments from the other men. McCarth is quite grateful to see him sober and not as sluggish as he imagines the others will be._

_After his training, he sits on his bed. He begins dismantling his bolt-action rifle, checking the mechanisms and reassembling it. The door creaks open and he places it on his draws.  
"Thought you weren't allowed your snipers in here?" Sebas. His voice was as smooth as always, despite it being an easy octave lower than Alvah's.   
"Well, I'm practicing assembly so I just gotta return it later." Sebas strolls over and perches on Alvah's bed with him. He was acting like nothing happened last night, and Alvah was quite content to play along.   
He hums and pouts a little, "They never let me bring _my _rifles back here."  
"What a shame! How on Earth will you carry on?" Sebas looks at him with mock displeasure, looks away and smiles soon after. Alvah can't help but smile too. _

_"How was your head this morning?"  
"Ahh, not too bad. Little sore but life goes on. Managed to live twenty-two years." He breathes out a laugh. "Westbridge was in a right state."  
"I'm not surprised." Sebas nods in agreement. There's a lull in the conversation, their bodies close but not as close as last night.   
"You haven't said anything."  
Alvah glances it him, "About what?"  
"Last night."  
"Oh, I thought we were pretending it never happened."  
He frowns slightly, "Why would we do that?"  
Alvah shrugs, but they both know exactly why. Sebas takes this as requiring reassurance, apparently, so runs his fingers down Alvah's outer arm to the back of his hand, before moving his hand back up to his bicep. It rests there, and he uses his other hand on his jaw to tilt Alvah's head toward him.   
"It's fine, don't worry about it. We'll..." he pauses, thinking, then smiles, "We'll be careful."  
Alvah smiles back too, but he's not convinced. Sebas catches it - he always does - and his voice is cautious. "Can I kiss you now?"  
"Yes, god yes."  
He leans forward, dropping one hand to his own and the other to the bed to counterbalance his shift. Alvah briefly looks down at their joined fingers before fluttering his eyes closed. Sebas' lips meet his, and Alvah's hand automatically goes to the side of his face. The kiss is gentle, but deeper than he'd expected. Sebas pulls back slightly, keeping them in close proximity. They both feel the others' breath fan their face. Sebas leans forward again, but just leaves a peck.   
"I told you I wouldn't regret it. Though, I would've regretted being drunk."  
Alvah chuckles and Sebas smiles, as relaxed as Alvah had ever seen him. _

_After a little while, Sebas backs off a more putting distance between them again. It felt like miles. Maybe this was why all the girls were obsessed about having boyfriends in high school.  
"You need to drop that gun off. I'll come with you."  
"You sure?"  
He hums, "Yeah." He stands and picks up Alvah's sniper. He turns it in his hands, admiring it, before looking back to Alvah. He gets up and pads over to the older man. Sebas turns to face him, adjusting his grip on the rifle; his eyes holding sincerity. "We'll be careful, I promise." He kisses him on the cheek and strolls out of the dorm, Alvah in tow.   
——x——_

He lay in bed, staring at the ceiling; sleep unsurprisingly avoiding him. The possibility of where this could go... how different _could_ it be? The wheel turns, or so they say. He swallows back his pride and sleep deprivation, picking up his phone and punching out a text. 

_‘Hi, you want to come round mine next week?’_


End file.
